Is a cash bar at a wedding reception tacky?

MasterPattie · 05-24-2015, 01:27 PM

roc21 · 05-24-2015, 02:07 PM

No, just cheap.

Hey wedding are expensive, if you can't afford the open bar oh well. Have a Sunday wedding, people won't mind not really drinking.

bbcardsrgreat · 05-24-2015, 02:10 PM

When I got married we provided a keg and a type of wine I think it was sparkletini it was pretty good if anyone wanted anything else it was cash bar most people drank beer and the ladies drank the wine stuff some people got cash bar but it was a nice option and saved money overall

death2redemptions · 05-24-2015, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by roc21

No, just cheap.

Hey wedding are expensive, if you can't afford the open bar oh well. Have a Sunday wedding, people won't mind not really drinking.

Unless they are alcoholics. 9 out of 10 of my family drink like we are Irish.

jiggidy · 05-24-2015, 02:14 PM

If there is a cash bar at a wedding I leave half of what I normally would for their gift.

Frankp2311 · 05-24-2015, 02:25 PM

Very tacky.

ilovethelakings · 05-24-2015, 02:35 PM

Tacky for sure.

freethrowtommy · 05-24-2015, 02:44 PM

TIL some people go to weddings to drink.

I don't find it tacky. Most of the cash bars I have seen give out beer and wine for free and the hard stuff you need to pay for. I don't see any problem with that. I didn't go to the person's wedding for the alcohol, I went for the people getting married.

thebrett · 05-24-2015, 02:44 PM

We are getting married in August and the plan is to buy some cases of wine $100 per case can get you some very decent wine at Costco

We will also have a variety of our favorite beers (Boulevard, Bell's, Red Stripe etc...)

Last but not least we will get some 1.75L of Costco Vodka, Jack Daniels and Bacardi and call it good

We hired bartenders from her old job for $100 each plus they get tips

All in we have a $2,500 budget and will have a ton of leftovers

preakness · 05-24-2015, 03:00 PM

Open bar only thing we ever considered

Same with friends and family

Might be south side Chicago / catholic thing

ssbledsoe · 05-24-2015, 03:02 PM

Eh, I see it both ways. I understand wanting to have lots of people attend and that it can be costly. That said, if you're going to invite people to your party, I can see how it's annoying to buy a wedding gift and then have to shell out for a cash bar...

xbignick · 05-24-2015, 03:28 PM

Your guests shouldn't pay for anything besides a gift. With that said cover at least the cost of your plate.

gatordeve86 · 05-24-2015, 03:34 PM

Delightfully Tacky, Yet Unrefined

Brobocop · 05-24-2015, 03:49 PM

I do not drink at all yet I think having a cash bar is somewhat lame. I've been to one wedding where there was a cash bar yet the wedding itself seemed to be overly expensive. I thought it was selfish for the bride and groom to throw this huge party that seemed to be all about them without really giving much care to their guests. To me, that's what it comes down to. Having good food and an open bar is showing gratitude to your guests for both taking the time to celebrate this moment with you and often times giving you a decent gift. Like I said, I get nothing out of an open bar yet when it comes to my own wedding, there is no debate, there will be an open bar.

I think if you can't afford what a catering hall may be charging for their bar, try to find a catering hall that will let you bring in your own alcohol. I've known a few couples that have done that and have saved tons of money that way. Like someone else said, when you buy your own alcohol you have the added benefit of having leftover alcohol for a long time to come.

TASS · 05-24-2015, 04:58 PM

As long as you at a minimum provide beer and wine I never had a problem with a cash bar at weddings.

I had an open bar for if I recall for 1 1/2hr. (just celebrated our 25th

), and know we got 'tuned up' pretty good as far as that expense. LOL

The only problem with an open bar is the amount of people throwing back shots that can get costly especially since we did not eliminate top shelf liquors so that was a pretty big expense, but you (hopefully) only do it once so you might as well do it right!

Frankp2311 · 05-24-2015, 04:59 PM

Honestly the cash bar is not that expensive. We had our wedding at a country club, and they provided all drinks (anything available) and charged their set rates. We had a lot of heavy drinkers and the tab for 4 hours was only $2800. Everyone was loose and having a great time. I was at a weeding of my friends and they were even charging for Coke and Ginger Ale on top of the alcohol. There were a lot of sober pissed off people and the conversation was all about how cheap this couple was. Dance floor was empty and people were checking their watches. Let's be honest, besides immediate family no one really wants to be there, so at least be a good host.

glen87 · 05-24-2015, 05:02 PM

limit it to specific items, or the bill will run up quickly.

you also will get people who:

A) get a drink
B) drink a sip and set it down somewhere
C) forget where they put it
D) go get a new one since it is "free"
E) take a sip and..........

repeat over and over

panther252 · 05-24-2015, 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brobocop

I do not drink at all yet I think having a cash bar is somewhat lame. I've been to one wedding where there was a cash bar yet the wedding itself seemed to be overly expensive. I thought it was selfish for the bride and groom to throw this huge party that seemed to be all about them without really giving much care to their guests. To me, that's what it comes down to. Having good food and an open bar is showing gratitude to your guests for both taking the time to celebrate this moment with you and often times giving you a decent gift. Like I said, I get nothing out of an open bar yet when it comes to my own wedding, there is no debate, there will be an open bar.

I think if you can't afford what a catering hall may be charging for their bar, try to find a catering hall that will let you bring in your own alcohol. I've known a few couples that have done that and have saved tons of money that way. Like someone else said, when you buy your own alcohol you have the added benefit of having leftover alcohol for a long time to come.

That's exactly how I feel. I find them insulting in a way. I've been to two weddings with cash bars, both weddings actually wound up making a profit from all the gifts too. All the tables would whisper how cheap they were being each time. My wife and her friends still talk/gossip about it to this very day...

longisland · 05-24-2015, 05:30 PM

There was no way we were going to have a cash bar. I wouldn't even let family offer to pay for it.

Irish and Italians at a wedding in New York should not have easy access to free booze. Most of the not so classy guests brought their own anyways.

TwinGnats · 05-24-2015, 06:03 PM

I had a Sunday morning wedding. Thick bacon, fresh waffles, etc. We had mimosas for everyone. Mimosas suck fyi. Almost nobody in either family drinks. We got a half keg for the grooms dinner with 70 people and they barely made a dent in it. I think maybe in a "drinking" family it might be different. I think end the end if you have a lot of money and you do a cash bar, it's tacky. If you don't it's necessary and thus not.

Brobocop · 05-24-2015, 06:17 PM

Side note, I used to be forced to watch that horrid Four Weddings show on TLC or whatever network, and I was always amazed by how much some of these weddings cost. I was even more amazed that some of these people had the backbone to pay $30-$40K for a wedding/reception and have a cash bar. Man, if you are dropping that kind of money on a reception and then say you can't afford a cash bar you really do not deserve to have anyone at your reception. That would probably be one of the last times I'd hang with those people.

lindeman79 · 05-24-2015, 07:45 PM

LOL... Yeah I'm a Krout and we are known for "the problem" and worse is the temper. The two do not go good together.

Quote:

Originally Posted by death2redemptions

Unless they are alcoholics. 9 out of 10 of my family drink like we are Irish.

roc21 · 05-24-2015, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glen87

limit it to specific items, or the bill will run up quickly.

you also will get people who:

A) get a drink
B) drink a sip and set it down somewhere
C) forget where they put it
D) go get a new one since it is "free"
E) take a sip and..........

repeat over and over

This doesn't matter, when you have an open bar its a set price regardless of how much is served.

fullmetal · 05-24-2015, 08:04 PM

The bride/groom should just go to the liquor store and buy $1000 or so worth of booze and then have a family member tend. I simply can't justify paying $12-15 for what is equal to a shot of bourbon. Either the drinker pays for it or the bride/groom are charged the same amount for it.

We had a small parents-only wedding/reception dinner, so didn't deal with it.

fullmetal · 05-24-2015, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by roc21

This doesn't matter, when you have an open bar its a set price regardless of how much is served.

Is that always true?

My wife's aunt had a birthday party that was like a wedding reception with an open bar and the bartender kept a tally of what was served in order to bill them for the drinks. A $25 bottle of Crown turns into a $500 bottle when paid by the drink.

View Poll Results: Is a cash bar at a wedding reception tacky?
Yes	114	60.96%
No	73	39.04%
Voters: 187. You may not vote on this poll

05-24-2015, 01:27 PM	#1
MasterPattie Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 8,750	Is a cash bar at a wedding reception tacky? Is a cash bar at a wedding reception tacky?

05-24-2015, 02:07 PM	#2
roc21 Member Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: Ft. Lauderdale, FL. Posts: 2,883	No, just cheap. Hey wedding are expensive, if you can't afford the open bar oh well. Have a Sunday wedding, people won't mind not really drinking. __________________ Vikings fan...but pc Dolphins for my son

05-24-2015, 02:10 PM	#3
bbcardsrgreat Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: McSherrystown, PA Posts: 2,333 bbcardsrgreat bbcardsrgreat	When I got married we provided a keg and a type of wine I think it was sparkletini it was pretty good if anyone wanted anything else it was cash bar most people drank beer and the ladies drank the wine stuff some people got cash bar but it was a nice option and saved money overall __________________ Always willing to trade for Orioles, Ravens, Phillies, Eagles, Pirates, Steelers, Redskins, Nationals and current year Bowman Chrome colored and base Refractors

05-24-2015, 02:14 PM	#5
jiggidy Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Michigan Posts: 8,261 midwestonlineresale jiggidy	If there is a cash bar at a wedding I leave half of what I normally would for their gift. __________________ 20% Off Auto Accept on COMC Collecting: Detroit Lions, Detroit Pistons, & Detroit Tigers Lions HOF Collection: 28 RC's, 5 GU, 13 Autos Buying Barry Sanders PSA Slabs

05-24-2015, 02:25 PM	#6
Frankp2311 Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Virginia Posts: 5,270	Very tacky.

05-24-2015, 02:35 PM	#7
ilovethelakings I make a lot of posts! Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: One of the 9 Realms Posts: 18,871	Tacky for sure. __________________ Looking for A&G sized minis and Topps Olympic relics, pins, etc. for my daughter and refractors for my son Favorite teams: Kings, Angels, Broncos, Packers, Steelers, Celtics, Globetrotters Siempre Coca Cola

05-24-2015, 02:44 PM	#8
freethrowtommy Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 31,686 freethrowtommy	TIL some people go to weddings to drink. I don't find it tacky. Most of the cash bars I have seen give out beer and wine for free and the hard stuff you need to pay for. I don't see any problem with that. I didn't go to the person's wedding for the alcohol, I went for the people getting married. __________________ Jordy Nelson PC: http://tinyurl.com/nelson87 Aaron Rodgers PC: http://tinyurl.com/rodgers12 And the Lord said unto John, "come forth and ye shall receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

05-24-2015, 02:44 PM	#9
thebrett Member Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: Bloomington, IL Posts: 5,119 Thebrett321 TheBrett	We are getting married in August and the plan is to buy some cases of wine $100 per case can get you some very decent wine at Costco We will also have a variety of our favorite beers (Boulevard, Bell's, Red Stripe etc...) Last but not least we will get some 1.75L of Costco Vodka, Jack Daniels and Bacardi and call it good We hired bartenders from her old job for $100 each plus they get tips All in we have a $2,500 budget and will have a ton of leftovers __________________ Blowout Forums Resident Topps Bunt guy I guess

05-24-2015, 03:00 PM	#10
preakness Member Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: In Johnny Ryno's soul Posts: 21,077	Open bar only thing we ever considered Same with friends and family Might be south side Chicago / catholic thing

05-24-2015, 03:02 PM	#11
ssbledsoe Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: At least 500 feet from DB11 Posts: 29,082 ssbledsoe ssbledsoe	Eh, I see it both ways. I understand wanting to have lots of people attend and that it can be costly. That said, if you're going to invite people to your party, I can see how it's annoying to buy a wedding gift and then have to shell out for a cash bar... __________________ Drew Bledsoe is a better QB than Patrick Mahomes

05-24-2015, 03:28 PM	#12
xbignick Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: New Jersey Posts: 29,309 xxbignick	Your guests shouldn't pay for anything besides a gift. With that said cover at least the cost of your plate. __________________ @xxbignick on twitter

05-24-2015, 03:34 PM	#13
gatordeve86 Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Central PA Posts: 5,604	Delightfully Tacky, Yet Unrefined

05-24-2015, 03:49 PM	#14
Brobocop Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: Cleveland, OH Posts: 13,951 brobocop2	I do not drink at all yet I think having a cash bar is somewhat lame. I've been to one wedding where there was a cash bar yet the wedding itself seemed to be overly expensive. I thought it was selfish for the bride and groom to throw this huge party that seemed to be all about them without really giving much care to their guests. To me, that's what it comes down to. Having good food and an open bar is showing gratitude to your guests for both taking the time to celebrate this moment with you and often times giving you a decent gift. Like I said, I get nothing out of an open bar yet when it comes to my own wedding, there is no debate, there will be an open bar. I think if you can't afford what a catering hall may be charging for their bar, try to find a catering hall that will let you bring in your own alcohol. I've known a few couples that have done that and have saved tons of money that way. Like someone else said, when you buy your own alcohol you have the added benefit of having leftover alcohol for a long time to come.

05-24-2015, 04:58 PM	#15
TASS Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: RI Posts: 11,789 stevetass	As long as you at a minimum provide beer and wine I never had a problem with a cash bar at weddings. I had an open bar for if I recall for 1 1/2hr. (just celebrated our 25th ), and know we got 'tuned up' pretty good as far as that expense. LOL The only problem with an open bar is the amount of people throwing back shots that can get costly especially since we did not eliminate top shelf liquors so that was a pretty big expense, but you (hopefully) only do it once so you might as well do it right! __________________ So if I am going to be a hater who hates the Patriots then buddy I am going to be the best damn hater I can be. I AM ALL IN.

05-24-2015, 04:59 PM	#16
Frankp2311 Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Virginia Posts: 5,270	Honestly the cash bar is not that expensive. We had our wedding at a country club, and they provided all drinks (anything available) and charged their set rates. We had a lot of heavy drinkers and the tab for 4 hours was only $2800. Everyone was loose and having a great time. I was at a weeding of my friends and they were even charging for Coke and Ginger Ale on top of the alcohol. There were a lot of sober pissed off people and the conversation was all about how cheap this couple was. Dance floor was empty and people were checking their watches. Let's be honest, besides immediate family no one really wants to be there, so at least be a good host.

05-24-2015, 05:02 PM	#17
glen87 Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: VERMONT Posts: 74,314 glen87 glen87	limit it to specific items, or the bill will run up quickly. you also will get people who: A) get a drink B) drink a sip and set it down somewhere C) forget where they put it D) go get a new one since it is "free" E) take a sip and.......... repeat over and over __________________ collecting James Madison University players of all sports JMU cards: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jmucards/ other cards: https://www.flickr.com/photos/glen87/albums

05-24-2015, 05:30 PM	#19
longisland Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Jacksonville Posts: 3,192	There was no way we were going to have a cash bar. I wouldn't even let family offer to pay for it. Irish and Italians at a wedding in New York should not have easy access to free booze. Most of the not so classy guests brought their own anyways. __________________ 2013-14 Panini Select Black Friday John Tavares 7/35 20%

05-24-2015, 06:03 PM	#20
TwinGnats Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Fridley, MN Posts: 1,645 PopCultureArchives	I had a Sunday morning wedding. Thick bacon, fresh waffles, etc. We had mimosas for everyone. Mimosas suck fyi. Almost nobody in either family drinks. We got a half keg for the grooms dinner with 70 people and they barely made a dent in it. I think maybe in a "drinking" family it might be different. I think end the end if you have a lot of money and you do a cash bar, it's tacky. If you don't it's necessary and thus not.

05-24-2015, 06:17 PM	#21
Brobocop Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: Cleveland, OH Posts: 13,951 brobocop2	Side note, I used to be forced to watch that horrid Four Weddings show on TLC or whatever network, and I was always amazed by how much some of these weddings cost. I was even more amazed that some of these people had the backbone to pay $30-$40K for a wedding/reception and have a cash bar. Man, if you are dropping that kind of money on a reception and then say you can't afford a cash bar you really do not deserve to have anyone at your reception. That would probably be one of the last times I'd hang with those people.

05-24-2015, 08:04 PM	#24
fullmetal Banned Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 13,249	The bride/groom should just go to the liquor store and buy $1000 or so worth of booze and then have a family member tend. I simply can't justify paying $12-15 for what is equal to a shot of bourbon. Either the drinker pays for it or the bride/groom are charged the same amount for it. We had a small parents-only wedding/reception dinner, so didn't deal with it.